God blew my mind today and I needed it.

God blew my mind today and I needed it. Even while I’m sitting here writing, I can feel God’s presence. I don’t know how to describe God’s presence but it is this peace that surrounds you with a feeling of comfort and love. God is powerful, man. I know God is always there, and I believe he always has a reason for everything and that his timing is perfect.

So today I was reading an Easter devotion. The reading came from Lamentations 1:12:

“Does it mean nothing to you, all you who pass by?
    Look around and see if there is any suffering like mine,
which the Lord brought on me
    when he erupted in fierce anger.”

Jeremiah was writing about Jerusalem’s pain after its devastation. Jeremiah was asking the people to look and see there was no greater suffering than Jerusalem’s.

The same can be said about what Jesus did for me and you. Jesus suffered on the cross for us. He bore our sins.

In Luke 23:46, Jesus shouted, “Father, I entrust my spirit into your hands!”

Those were Jesus’ last words he breathed before he died on the cross.

The devotion I read today said this Easter to look and be quiet. To look and worship Jesus because there is nothing really to say before the type of unconditional love that Jesus demonstrated on the cross.

That pierced my heart. I read this devotion everyday and I am glad I did again today. God always puts things in front of us when we need them most. I needed to feel his Spirit again. I needed to be reminded of his love and how good God is. It made me stop and thank Jesus for all he has done for me. I don’t deserve his grace, but he gave it to me freely. I make the same mistakes over and over, but yet God gives me grace and forgiveness over and over. God has given me countless second chances.

The last few months haven’t been easy. I’ve been dealing with some personal struggles like anxiety and I’ve kind of felt stagnant in my faith. I haven’t been growing as much as I want.

What I really think has got in the way is pride and control. Pride has got in the way of letting God help me and I have wanted to be take control and do it my way. In reality, God is the one in control. He’s the Creator of the Universe. God made me in his image.

This week, God has been showing me to trust him and to keep being obedient to where he is leading me. We need daily encounters with Jesus for him to change us. God wants to set us free. I prayed tonight to God and said, Father, I entrust my spirit into your hands. I needed to surrender again to God’s power. God, all of my worries, struggles, and anxiety are Yours. All of me is Yours, Lord.

 

This Easter, I am going to worship at Jesus’ feet. I am going to thank him for his grace, his unfailing and unconditional love, and for his mercy and forgiveness. It means something extra right now. God is working. God freed me today from the fears that I have been having with anxiety. I am beyond thankful that God blew my mind today. I can’t wait to worship on Easter Sunday, which is the greatest day in history and celebrate Jesus’ resurrection.

Happy Easter! God loves you. God is so good.

 

God taught me to appreciate life in 2016

 

2016 flew by.

This year I think I learned most to appreciate life and be thankful each day.

I miss writing. I don’t do it enough anymore. I have to admit lately, words haven’t come easy to write or type. Nowadays, I use my time at work capturing video. I still get to do interviews and meet tons of awesome people with amazing stories. I miss writing the stories and telling the stories through words, though. From reading the sports page for the first time as a first grader and then becoming a sports writer at a newspaper, that was a dream come true. I feel often like I gave up that dream.

I know though, too, God has me where I am for a reason working at a television station. It’s given me the ability to refine another hobby and talent I have. This job has taught me a lot over the last year. I shifted from covering sports in a small town in Iowa to coming back to South Dakota to cover news, and a little sports here and there. Sports is my passion. I miss it. But covering news has allowed me to see new things. It’s the people that I encounter that I love about the job. I love listening to people’s stories and experiences. I’ve met police officers, firefighters, business owners, teachers, students, athletes, musicians, doctors, and just normal ordinary people that have made an impact on the world.

Here’s a few stories that have impacted me in 2016 –

I saw the downtown community of Sioux Falls rally around a tragedy a few weeks ago after a building collapsed. I saw the ups and downs of that day. I saw the power of prayer work. Some might say why did God allow a woman and her dogs to be rescued but not the construction worker that day? I don’t have that answer, but I know for sure God was there that day on Phillips Avenue in downtown Sioux Falls. People were praying in a nearby coffee shop, and I was by a man from Tampa, Florida on top of a parking ramp that was praying. Sioux Falls saw joy and heartache that day. Being a Christian isn’t easy and sometimes God allows there be suffering. There was good that came out of that day. The downtown businesses rallied around that construction worker’s family by giving back some of their income to the family. The coffee shop nearby the building collapsed, had encouraging notes on a window that people had wrote about the construction worker and for all the hard work the first responders put in that day. I was proud of my town that day.

I love the days I get to share my faith at work, too. Sometimes after interviews, I will sit and talk to people. I met an artist from Estelline, South Dakota. I met this woman at an art fair and just started asking her about her art. She was a violin player, and now is starting to lose her hearing. She is painting musical instruments now. She also paints God’s faithfulness and shares through painting about how she is a cancer survivor. I was able to make a connection because my mom is a cancer survivor, too, and my faith is a big part of my life. That day taught me that I can meet someone with an amazing story any day and all I have to do is smile, have a positive attitude, and be willing to listen. My work really is my mission field. I may not be a missionary, but I have the ability to share Jesus wherever I go.

I also got to share my faith with a police officer one day. I interviewed an officer about going to Des Moines after two officers there had lost their lives. He shared with me how knowing Jesus is always there gives him comfort because being in the line of duty can be a dangerous job.

Another day at work I had to drive to Estelline, (there must be something amazing about the people in that town – wink, wink), and interview a high school senior about being named scholar of the week. Towards the end of the interview, she gave advice for underclassman and that advice stuck with me because it’s applicable to anyone. It’s deep. Here’s what it was:

You need to take care of yourself before you try to take on all these things because if you are going around half asleep all the time, and drained emotionally, you’re going to suffer. You need to get sleep, take care of your body and sometimes you have to say no to people. Don’t have that attitude that nothing matters, or I don’t care. People need to keep that inspiration they had when they were a child – I want to be something great and not just, I want to barely do enough to get a job to get a job that pays enough. Because we are going to get a point where no one wants to do work to be great and someone else will do it for you. There are going to other people that are going to make the most out of these opportunities.

That advice was from LeAnnah. She’s a high school senior and I’m sure she is going to go far in life. Her advice is so true. LeAnnah motivated me that day.

These are just a few stories over the last year made an impact on me. They are why I love being a journalist. Sometimes the media gets a bad rap. I understand that. Trust me, working in the news during this past election, exhausted me. I have to say it made me want to get out of journalism and really miss covering sports even more. But I know this The sun rose the next day after the election on November 9 and will continue to because God is in control. I know God gave me my gifts in writing, and in photography. I’m going to keep going. I don’t know where God is going to take me, but I trust in God and in his plan completely. Who knows, part of God’s plan may be to have me get back into sports writing someday. But in 2016, God taught me to love where I am at.

I met some incredible people. I work with a lot of awesome people. I have an amazing family and friends. Most importantly, I have the best Father in heaven that loved me so much that he sent his son, Jesus, to be born in a manger and to die on the cross for my sins so I could be saved by his amazing grace. That’s love. Now everyday, I need to share that same love Jesus gave me with me the people in my life.

Wherever God guides me in 2017, I will follow. All of me is Yours, Jesus.

P.S.

I’ll write soon again. I am praying for all of you and love you a lot.

 

 

 

 

 

 

I called out my insecurities

I told myself I was going to try to go to bed early tonight but then I started thinking and now I’m blogging. So here this goes.

Every year it seems like I go through the same season of life. I hit a really high point and then about in August always, I start to struggle again. It must be since summer is winding down and a new season, fall is about to start.

One thing that’s never wavered is my faith. I always know and believe God is there and in the good and bad times. I know that God puts different seasons in our lives. For me, this one over the last year been filled with ups and downs.

My mentor told me to make a list of my insecurities. So I want to call out my insecurities. I overthink stuff, I suck at making decisions, I worry about the future, I have regrets about giving up my dream of being a sports writer, and other things and I think that I have to have a plan and be perfect and that I can’t fail at stuff.

I think those are the root of my problems and they are things Satan tries to get me to stumble on. I have to be honest, I’ve fallen for them too much and I’m sick of letting the devil get a foothold because God is the most important thing in my life and in Him he can help me defeat these insecurities.

I remember that my God is so good. He’s faithful. He’s never given up on me and never will. He has a perfect plan. I was reading a girl’s blog tonight and it hit home. She used two Bible verses to sum up what she is going through and they are perfect for what I am going through too. First, she shared Proverbs 16:9. It reads, “A man’s heart plans his way, but the Lord directs his steps.  Second, she also shared John 13:7, and it reads, “Jesus replied, you do not realize now what I am doing, but later you will understand.”

For me, I’ve had a lot of jobs. I got out of college and was faced with rejection after rejection. Then I got my dream job of being a sports writer. But after a year, I called it quits because I got burned out and got lonely. Yeah, I missed my family and friends. Now some of my best friends have moved away or started doing other things. I feel like I had started my dream but abandoned it. I have constant regrets about it. I work at a television station now and enjoy it. The people are amazing. I’m a photographer and editor. I shoot and edit stories. But I miss being able to write and tell the stories. I have to understand that God has me where I am at for a reason and maybe someday, he will put me back into sports writing. Like the title of this blog, I have to love where I am at. I need to trust God and let him direct my steps. I may not understand what God is doing, but I have to be patient because the end result is going to be sweet. God’s given me talents and gifts and abilities and I need to use them to glorify Him.

God always knows what’s best. Through it all, my eyes are you, Lord. Take away my insecurities and help me focus on you. I can do all this through Him, who gives me strength (Philippians 4:13).

loving where I’m at

It’s been a few months since I’ve blogged.

Life’s been pretty good lately, but I’ve also had some thoughts and doubts about what I want to do in my life.

Six months ago I moved back to Sioux Falls and quit my job at a newspaper and came back to work at a television station. It’s been a learning experience because I’m not doing sports anymore and just doing news mixed in a with a little sports on the weekend.

I’ve got to enjoy a lot more work/life balance with the new job and having a few daytime hours. But I miss sports and writing about them. I was watching USD play in the WNIT semifinals last night and saw one of their players, Tia Hemiller, throw a baseball-like pass that went in from half court to beat the shot clock. I miss covering those plays and the joy that comes from big games. Covering the 2015 Le Mars boys basketball team was so fun and I miss that team.

Switching to news has helped me become a lot more up to date with what’s going on in today’s world like in government and politics. Just like in sports, I’ve met a lot of people and lately, with the people I meet, I try to listen and really take in an interest in their lives. My church’s latest sermon series was about ‘Love where you are.’ I’ve been trying to love where I am at. I put a red dot on the back of my IPhone to tell me that I am here. As a Christ-follower, God wants us to be the hands and feet of Jesus. Whoever I meet, I could be the only Jesus they see. So am I living and loving like Jesus? Like for instance, I have talked about church and my faith with several co-workers. I invited a lady to the gym to Easter service. Just earlier today, I got to talking to another lady at the gym about today’s world and about God. She told me that she doesn’t have to be afraid because she has God. That was super encouraging and refreshing. It’s amazing the conversations you can have if  you just listen to others.

Working in Sioux Falls has been a blessing and it’s been hard. I get to meet a ton of new people and work with a ton of awesome people. Having a job in journalism is like having a big family because we’re around each other a lot and work long hours together. With this job, like I said earlier, I’ve got to have some daytime hours and it’s allowed me to spend more time with my family and friends. It’s allowed me to get involved at church by serving and by going to a life group. It’s allowed me to go to the gym and get stronger physically.  God’s so good.

Sometimes though, I still struggle and feel like I gave up my dream of sports writing. I only gave it a year. I feel like I didn’t get everything accomplished I wanted to back in Le Mars. I also have fears that while I am trying to figure out what I want to do with a job, I won’t meet a girl because I’m purring my professional life ahead of my personal life.

But I’m only 25 and am still young. With that, I was listening to ESPN Radio and two of my favorites, Ryen Russillo and Danny Kanell. Someone asked Russillo if you don’t end up getting married, have you ever thought you won’t have that moment in your life? I think Russillo said he was 40. So obviously, he’s a lot older than me. But what he went on to say made me think and is true about what I think. Russillo said in what he messed up because he hasn’t peaked yet professionally and has wanted to accomplish other stuff. He said he’s become obsessed with his professional life and put off his personal life. As a journalist, I think that happens a lot. For me, I see a lot of my friends getting married and having kids and being in relationships. I’m still trying to figure out what I want to do in my life and what I want to do. I’ve had jobs at television stations, a radio station and a newspaper. I think I want to write again, though. (I’m going to try to blog more) 

I’m still young and have a lot of life to live. So I have time to meet a girl. But what Russillo said just made me think and especially how he ended that segment. Russillo said a buddy said to him, ‘what are you going to do?’ Russillo said he’s fine and if he can get these things done, then he will be good and will done with the rest of it. His buddy said, ‘you know what I did, I wanted to share all that stuff with somebody.’

Like woah. That hit me. Yeah, I want to try and figure out what I am good at and what I want to do. But like I still want to spend my life with someone else that I can share my passion with and do life together with. I trust God has an awesome sister in Christ out there for me. So, I don’t know. But I do this. I trust God. God has a plan and it’s wicked awesome. LIfe takes trust, faith and you have to wait patiently sometimes. God’s not done with me yet and I’m just going to keep giving all of me to Him and trusting Him because He’s so good. Help me Lord, to love where I am at.

All I am is Yours, Lord. You’re a good, good Father, Lord. You love me and I love you, Lord.

2015 taught what’s most important

every year when it’s time to turn the calendar to a new year, it seems like the years keep going by faster. being a photojournalist, I can use this imagery to help me find what’s important. Life can be a fuzzy sometimes, but at the end of the day, I have to ask myself, did I take time to focus or was it a blur?

was God first? did I take time to recognize how awesome the people are around me or was I too concerned with me?

it’s selfish in nature to think of ourselves. I admit I struggle with this. In the Christmas season at church this year, a sermon was taught on Elizabeth. She was barren and it wasn’t until she was old that God had blessed with her a child. And at the same time, Mary was pregnant with Jesus. But Elizabeth’s response was different. In Luke 1, verse 41, Elizabeth was filled with Holy Spirit when she saw Mary. She told Mary in verses 42 to 45:

“God has blessed you above all women, and your child is blessed. Why am I so honored, that the mother of my Lord should visit me? When I heard your greeting, the baby in my womb jumped for joy. You are blessed because you believed that the Lord would do what he said.”

when I was at church during that sermon, I thought how often to do jump for joy or celebrate the blessings of others before my own? it me hard. yea, it’s easy in today’s age, when we can log on to Facebook and see other people getting married or having kids.

this year, I struggled with being content and wanting everything. I think it’s part of reason I quit my job writing that loved. but the American dream is to have a perfect job, a spouse and children. after hearing that sermon, God showed me that he has a different plans for everyone. for some people, he’s blessed them with marriages, families and jobs. for others, he’s still working out those plans.

yea, I’m 24, almost 25 in a month (woah I can rent a car!!!), single and I have a job. I know God’s still working his plan and I just have to be patient. while I’m being patient, I’m want to be genuinely happy and share in other’s blessings. that’s what I want to work on in 2016. I have the best family and I have the best friends doing amazing things for God in Africa, or that are in different states, or going to grad schools, or graduating from grad schools, or in law schools, or that have awesome jobs here in Sioux Falls or in different countries like Spain playing basketball or in England or in Arkansas and soon moving to Germany. And I met some new awesome friends down South that live in Missouri, Arkansas, Oklahoma and Texas. I’m glad I could be a part of their lives. you guys are awesome. 🙂

all in all, looking back on 2015. it was like a beautiful mess. I learned a lot. I smiled and some nights, at 3 am coming home from work, I cried ‘cuz I wanted to give up. but in all those long sleepless nights, I knew I wasn’t alone. God’s always by my side. i worked at a newspaper for a year in small town Iowa. I lived by myself. I learned a lot. I do miss it and do have regrets leaving now just ‘cuz I miss writing and making an impact in the lives of athletes. I loved capturing the joy of kids. I wrote a lot of cool stories.

I came back home to Sioux Falls. I took a job here. it’s a new experience and is shooting video. new experiences are good. they can give you new skills to keep with you for the rest of your life. I’ve learned that. I miss writing. but for now, I have to focus on where I’m at. God’s got a plan and it’s good. so good. I have learned to keep trusting and to have a faith that doesn’t give up ‘cuz God has never given up on me and never will.

In my job I write or tell about people’s lives in stories or video, God’s still doing the same in my life. I just have a job and am single. maybe God’s called me to singleness or maybe he still has the perfect girl out there for me. yea, I struggle with this. this year in 2015, I had met a girl. we talked for awhile, but then because I then I decided to pursue career first and keep waiting. I do wish sometimes I would have pursued it but I have to live with it. my grandma also tried finding a girl for me. I wrote a letter to her. but never got a response. I just got to remain patient.

again, I do miss writing. however, I have to accept the fact I moved on. who knows, maybe in the future, God will have a job for me to write again. life’s too short to have regrets so I have to keep focusing on how I can grow closer to God and how I can continue to be support the people I love.

all I am is Yours, God.

Twas the night before Christmas: 2016 Sports Edition

Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the house, not a creature was stirring. Not even a Buckeye.

The crystal ball was hung. By the sideline with care in hopes that Urban or Mariota soon would be there.

The Buckeyes and Ducks were nestled all safe in their beds with visions of a championship danced in their heads

Cardale was the third best but shined the brightest. Zeke ran wild in his crop top. And made the Ducks a quack.

And mom in her kerchief. And I in my cap just settled down for a long winters nap.

When out on the lawn. There arose such a clatter. I sprang from my bed. To see what was the matter

Marshawn didn’t get the ball at the one. and Butler saved the day. Brady won his fourth ring. Cheaters or not, the Pats were the best.

Away to the window. I flew like a flash. Tore open the shutters. And threw up the sash

The Lombardi on the breast. Of the new fallen champs. Gave the lustre. Of midday. To object below

when what to my wandering eyes should appear but a huge Wells Report.

Did the Patriots cheat? Are Tom’s balls clean?

With a little ol driver. So lively and quick. I knew in a moment. It must be Goodell.

More rapid than eagles. His curses they came. And he whistled. And shouted. And called them by name

Now Robert.

Now Bill.

Now Tom.

Now John.

Now Jim.

To the top of the porch. To the top of the court. Now dash away. Dash away all

March came in like a lamb but out like a Blue Devil. Duke reigned supreme. And Bucky fell short under Bo’s last stand.

A new Jordan rose to fame. not MJ, but Speith. The Masters was the start. Golf’s got its golden boy back

Mayweather-Pac was supposed to be the best, To give boxing a name again. But it was more of a snooze fest. Floyd got the win just like it had been

So up to the housetop. The court. They flew. With a playbook full of tricks. And Steph Curry too

And then in a twinkling. I heard in Game 6. The cheers. The roars for Steph and little Riley.

Curry was ridiculous, Riley was the cutest Wayyyy up, she felt blessed.The Warriors took down Lebron.

As I drew in my head. And was turning around down the chimney, Lord Stanley came with a bound.

He was dressed. All in red and black. From his head to his footAnd his clothes were all tarnished with beer and champagne.

The Blackhawks won once more. Duncan’s smile wasn’t pretty,It didn’t get sore though. Chicago was the best hockey city

The Cubs made a run too. But the Mets and Murphy outslugged them. KC went back to the World Series. And won, making it a blue October for first time since ’85

2015 was also the year of the woman. Serena almost completed a slam. She’s still got it at age 33. And the best in the world and Sportsperson of the Year, too

The U.S women won the World Cup. Abby went out on top. Carli scored not once, but three times. She made young girls want to kick it like her

Rousey was a badass. She packed a punch that ended three fights in 130 seconds. But Ronda proved to be human too when Holly knocked her out. Still Rousey showed how to fight like a girl.

This year was great and it’s not over yet. There’s still bowls and games to be played. Sit back, enjoy it with your family and friends

Look ahead to the next year

What’s it going to bring?

Super Bowl 50. The Summer Olympics in Rio. And a Ronda and Holm rematch are on the horizon

Merry Christmas to all and a Happy New Year. And to all a good night.

Life moves fast.

I was covering a high school regional finals softball game Monday night. A team I was covering was looking to get back to state after winning the last two state two titles. Their pitcher is a sophomore and she was throwing a no-hitter. It was impressive. Her team was up 1-0 and she was three outs away from a no-hitter. But in the bottom of the seventh, she lost the no-hitter when the first batter hit a single. Then the next batter smacked a home run over left field fence and the game was over.

I was ready to shoot a celebration photo. But in a matter of seconds and minutes, their season was over.

I talked to her after the game and she said she threw a change-up and it was her pitch.

But life throws you fastballs, change-ups and curveballs. Life goes by fast. Life doesn’t always go as planned.

Isn’t it crazy how fast things change? Isn’t it crazy how fast time moves when you get older?

I remember being a kid and couldn’t wait to be a grown up. Now I miss being a kid. I think sometimes as kids, we took life for granted. (Life as an adult is fun, though. I’m blessed with a loving family and friends, a job, a place to sleep and food to eat).

In the last year, I took a big jump by moving away from my hometown to take a job. It’s been difficult. But God never promised life would be easy. Life is beautiful and messy and filled with joy and heartaches.  I’m thankful for God’s grace and how he never gave up on me. I’m not going to give up.

When I was the only reporter covering seven high schools, there was long nights. I wanted to give up.  A lot. And on the cold, windy nights and on the hot, summer nights.

But I didn’t. It’s been a great experience. I’ve loved being able to capture moments and write stories about people’s lives. I’m thankful God’s given me a gift to write.  I love helping people and making people feel noticed. My hope each day is that I’ve made/will make an impact on someone’s life.

I’ve learned that working in sports is tiring. I didn’t have a day off in 39 days off through the end of May to the beginning of July. It’s not like most jobs where you go to work at eight in the morning and come home at five at night. I usually went to work at four in the afternoon and then come home around one or two in morning. When I was by myself, it was three or four in the morning some nights. It’s exhausting. It’s honestly a lonely job because then I sleep to 11 in the morning and wait to go to work. It’s hard to meet people when you work nights and weekends. For me, I’m an introvert. I like to be alone. I’m found that at times I love part of my job and other times I don’t want to work in this field. I love being able to make a difference in telling people’s stories, but it’s the long hours and the weird hours that are draining. And there isn’t much time off. I think in the 39 days straight I worked, I worked 50 to 55 hours each week. I was burnt out.

As I’ve learned about working in sports, it’s been hard to have a social life. It’s hard to take vacations and I can see why many don’t start families until their in their 30s and 40s. I’m 24. I’m single and not getting older. I’ve worried about working in sports and nights, that I won’t find a girl. I talked to a girl in the last year and we liked each other, but now we’re just friends. I think because of my job I didn’t further pursue and sometimes I wish I wouldn’t have been so consumed with work. And I think working in sports, it’s consuming work. My friends took a vacation to the lake and I didn’t go because I didn’t have enough vacation (I know with experience it takes multiple years to build up vacation). I think working a job is hard to develop and build relationships.

My parents generation taught us that we have to work and our hard work will pay off. I believe that. I’m a perfectionist and I save my money and I want to show my employers that I work hard. The baby boomers generations helped instill hard work into my generation. I’m thankful for my dad that he taught me how to work hard.

But I think, with my millennial generation and as a twenty something, we want work/life balance. As millennials, we are hard working men and women. We want to be respected and we know that it takes hard work to be promoted. It’s hard for us to realize that we have to sacrifice fun times for days at work. I feel like with my job, and with many people in sports, that balance is especially hard to find. I love working in sports, trust me. But I also feel like I’ve missed some memories with the people that love me. It’s hard to find and develop relationships.

So, it’s been an adventure living my own. I’ve learned a lot about myself. I’ve watched a lot of Netflix and sports (although, watching sports by yourself isn’t as fun). I’ve ran a lot of miles in the cold and in the heat. I’ve eaten two and half gallons of ice cream on my own (so far) this summer. I’ve become stronger in my faith because God’s always been there for me this year. I’m thankful I can I say little prayers to him. I’m thankful that my relationship with God is the strongest relationship I have. I’m thankful that can call him Daddy.  I’m thankful too when I’ve gotten lonely I can call my mom and dad. My mom and dad helped make me a hard worker and a man of faith. I’m thankful for my brother. And, I’m thankful that my friends are only a text away. My friends I gained at USF are encouraging and loving and caring. They know when to pick me up when I’m having a bad day. So thanks guys.

And I’ve been thinking about moving back home for awhile. I feel like I’ve missed making memories and building relationships since I’ve moved away.

But I don’t know what to do really. I don’t know what job I might find there? Should I go back to school and find a different job? But in all my questions, I trust God’s plan for me and I won’t ever stop trusting it. I don’t have to worry and doubt. God’s got it taken care of.

I’ve learned to have a positive outlook on life. To be truly grateful for life.

I was watching television and the ESPY’s were on tonight. They helped me to not give up and to be grateful. Lauren Hill was a basketball player who lost her life to cancer earlier this year. She was honored and so was, Leah Still, who is the daughter of NFL player, Devon Still. She is battling cancer.

Lauren lost her life, but she got her wish and played a college basketball game before she died. She started Lay-ups for Lauren to help fight cancer.

Leah is a little girl, who is five that has inspired many. I’m praying for you, Leah.

Personally, my mom is really important to me.

She showed me to never give up and how life is precious when she beat cancer when I was in elementary school. She is a hell of a fighter.

As Stuart Scott said, “So live. Fight like hell and when you get too tired to fight, lay down and rest and let someone else fight for you.”

A lot of people go through troubles. We all do. We can choose to stay positive and fight and never give up. Never, ever give up.

God has a plan for me. I KNOW THAT AND TRUST THAT AND BELIEVE THAT WITH ALL OF MY HEART.  And His plan is good and he’s still working. I’m grateful I’m healthy, I’m loved by God, my family and friends. In gift of writing God’s given me, I hope I can make others feel loved. I hope I can share the love God’s given me to the world around me because it’s important to tell the ones you love, you love them. Life moves fast.

So thanks God for saving me by amazing grace. This past year hasn’t been easy. But life is worth fighting for because you, Lord gave your life for me. This past year, you, Lord taught me to live each day and taught to me never stop loving people. To live in the moment. I hope I’ve made a difference in someone’s life and hope I make a difference in many more through stories, photographs, videos, conversations or memories I make.

This is my heart and what’s been going in my life. I just wanted to share. I love all of you and cherish our relationships. I hope I’ve made an impact on you.

 

Wait or settle?

Should I be settling down or waiting?

I’m a journalist.

I’m in sports and work nights, usually from 4 p.m. to midnight. Sometimes like last night until 2:30 a.m.

I think it’s an odd job.

But I love sports and make sacrifices as a result.

Working nights is tough. But it’s the job I’ve chosen. In my field of journalism, there’s a lot of turnover each year. I talked to a coach and he wished a reporter would stick around.

Unfortunately that’s the way it is. It’s a field where you have to start at bottom to get experience. In order to get experience, you start at a small newspaper, television or radio station. Then a year rolls around and they leave.

So I think in the last two years I’ve been out of college and in media field, I’ve seen journalists put their career ahead of the rest of their lives. They wait to get married and start a family.

I see others on my Facebook getting married. I’m happy for you, trust me.

But then I wonder what I’m doing with my life. I’m 24, and single. Should I be pursuing a family over my job?

My grandma, and know she was having fun, said how are you suppose to find a girl when you work nights?

I don’t know, grandma.

I do know, though, I am trusting God with his plan because he forgave me for my past, is with me today and knows what my future holds.

I enjoy my job, even though it’s stressful. I have to cover seven high schools by myself for a newspaper. Writing, taking photos and designing pages. It’s great experience. It’s hard. It’s teaching me time management. What I love most about journalism is the ability to tell stories and listen. I enjoy capturing moments for others to cherish and remember.

So while I want to get married someday, and have kids. I’m okay with waiting.

Habakkuk 2:3 says: (ASV) ‘For still the vision awaits its appointed time; it hastens to the end—it will not lie.
If it seems slow, wait for it; it will surely come; it will not delay.’ 

The Message struck me, too. The heading read, ‘Full of self, but soul-empty.’

Verses 2 and 3: ‘And then God answered: “Write this. Write what you see. Write it out in big block letters so that it can be read on the run. This vision-message is a witness pointing to what’s coming. It aches for the coming—it can hardly wait! And it doesn’t lie! If it seems slow in coming, wait. It’s on its way. It will come right on time.’ 

Sometimes I think I’m guilty of being selfish and trying to find what makes soul happy. We want to be successful. We forget. I forget. We sometimes let busyness of our lives forget God gave up himself for me and you. He said in Ephesians 5 to be imitators of him. To live a life of love just as Christ loved us and gave himself up as a sacrifice to God. Jesus is all our souls need.

I read further in Ephesians 5 and came to verse 14: ‘Wake up O Sleeper, rise from dead and Christ will shine on you.’

Daily I need to wake up and realize, it’s not my life, but his and he has a greater plan.

So how can I apply this to waiting? Well, I would like a wife or family. But I am okay with waiting for God’s timing. I am as a journalist and starting at a newspaper in a small town. I know God is with me. He has a vision. It may be slow in coming, but I know his plan is coming and it will come at right time.

It was hard moving away from Sioux Falls. It gets lonely. I miss my friends and family every day. (You guys know who you are).

I’ve wanted to quit and move back and live bachelor life with my bros.

But I think it was a step for God to tell me to trust him. It was a getting out of the boat experience. He’s teaching me to walk on water with him because I know every step I take, he’s right behind. He’s teaching me to know he’s in first place in my life.

I am eager each day to see what God has in store. I’m finding every day in my soul who God is forming me to be.

My soul is well. It is well with Jesus. All I am is his.

God moments defined my 2014

I was driving home from work tonight, and almost started crying because I was feeling like I wanted to give up.

Yesterday, I wrote an emotionally-draining piece on a 73-year old track coach who died unexpectedly on Christmas Eve. I spent two hours interviewing former runners, coaches and people who had known him. I struggled to write it, but I needed a challenge.

Then today I found out today another person turned the job and now I am still left by myself to cover seven high schools sports. I felt stressed.

I wanted to just give up.

But while I was thinking and a few tears came rolling down my face, Oceans by Hillsong was playing. I love that song. And these lyrics struck me again, as they have numerous times this year:

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior
Oh, Jesus, you’re my God!

I just knew God was right there.

And as 2014 comes to a close tomorrow at midnight and then 2015 rolls in, I have to stop and thank God for being so faithful and with me.

I knew that I couldn’t give up just because life was getting hard. Because God is there in good and bad times. I could feel God right there with me.

So in 2014, I felt God a lot. I learned to become still. I learned to say, ‘Spirit fall on me.’

God told me in 2014, I got you, Sam. Do you got me?

I could hear him say my name in Jeremiah 29:11-13:

For I know the plans I have for you (Sam). They are plans good and not disaster, to give you (Sam) a future and a hope. In those days when you (Sam) pray, I will listen. If you (Sam) look for me wholeheartedly, you (Sam) will find me.

Yes, Lord, I got you. Thanks for being with me another year and can’t wait to be with you in 2015.

So in 2014, I took comfort in God. God gave me peace. & I know God has a plan for me. It’s going to be good. God’s taught me to live for today, and not for tomorrow. He’s taught me to be content in my circumstances and to be happy. He’s taught me to love people. To listen to people’s stories. I’ve learned that my family and friends are everything. (I love you mom, dad, bro, and my Bffs.) I love everyone in my life. God’s blessed me a ton. I’m so thankful for you.

I freaking genuinely love you guys. Yesterday’s story I wrote was a good reflection. Life can take you anytime. I know that my salvation is in Him and cannot wait to sing, dance and talk to my Daddy in Heaven. In my 23rd year of life, I have learned to cherish each day. Every year gets shorter it seems. I just want my loved ones to know I love and care about them. 

So as 2015 awaits, I know that God will be me in every good situation and whatever challenges he has in store for me. & I can’t wait!

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders in 2015. I’ll go wherever you take me.

Happy New Year. May God bless you.

P.S. I really do freaking genuinely love my God, my family and my friends. I wanted you all to hear that.

All I am is Yours, Lord.

Twas the night before Christmas (SPORTS EDITION!!!!)

Twas the night before Christmas,

Jameis became Publix and stole a national championship and crab legs

Not a creature was stirring and then Richard Sherman said IMMA THE BEST CORNERBACK IN THE NFL!!

The stockings were hung at Metlife in hopes Peyton would win, but Russell won instead

T.J. Oshie was a hero, but EH it wasn’t good enough for gold

March came in like a lion when Mercer showed no mercy and  upset Duke (NOOOOOO)

The children were nestled all snug in their beds but then Aaron Harrison hit not one, not two, but three game winning three-pointers

But Shabazz Napier complained to the NCAA he went hungry to bed and won the title over Big Blue Nation

Some horse set the Tone and spoiled Chrome’s quest for a triple crown

Los Angles were KINGS in hockey again

The Spurs aren’t too old to win NBA titles; He’s TIMMY after all.

USA yelled to the world, ‘I believe we can win,”

But in the end America remembered football is the real futbol.

Then Rory had the best break-up of his life or ever.

And Mama in her ‘kerchief, and I in my cap,
had just settled our brains for a long winter’s nap.

Wait, don’t sleep because LeBron’s coming home and bringing all the Love with him and his best friend named Mike too

When out on the roof there arose such a clatter, I sprang from my bed to see what was the matter –

Yeah Jeets hit a walk-off in his last Yankee Stadium game.

Aaron Rodgers said R-E-L-A-X and Tom Brady’s too old???

Ray Rice and Adrian Peterson learned a lesson, it’s never okay to hit a woman or child

Away to the window I flew like a flash, the Giants aren’t Bums and neither is that Madison pitcher

With a little old driver, so lively and quick, I knew in a moment it must be the pink slip,

Now Bo is no Mo in Lincoln, Now Brady (c)Hoked in Ann Arbor (wink) and Now he’s Mus-chump in Gainesville

Now Is Jim Harbaugh next? (HAPPY BDAY JIMMY) (PS please come to Ann Arbor?)

A bundle of toys he had flung on his back,
and he looked like a peddler just opening his pack…

for chaos in college football because TCU and Baylor got left out and the Big 12 had no title game

and Ohio State got a gift because they were on their third quarterback.

Then Johnny Football became Johnny Clipboard, Johnny Bench, Johnny Starter, Johnny Interception, Johnny Hurt and Johnny out of the season

And then in a twinkling, I heard on the roof
the prancing and pawing of each little hoof.
As I drew in my head and was turning around,
down the chimney, Tony Romo can win in Demcember?!

Then Marshawn went Beast Mode and said, ‘NAH THANKS FOR ASKING.”

He sprang to his sleigh, to his team gave a whistle,

On Epstein, on Maddon, on Lester

And away they all flew like the down of a thistle but I heard him exclaim, ‘ere he drove out of sight,

‘Go Cubs Go,’ is 2015 the end of the curse of the Billy Goat?

And Happy Christmas to all, and to all a good night!